So……. this write brings me much joy.  When the Cow Boss and I were first dating in college, I can remember my friends say things like: “I want to marry a rich cowboy” And as a new comer to the sport, yes, dating a cowboy should be an Olympic sport, I will go into more detail shortly, I knew there was more to this whole “rich cowboy” fantasy.

Let me start by saying rich and cowboy are like antonyms, and oxymoron, contradiction of terms.  Rich cattlemen, YES, rich farmer, YES, rich cowboy, NO.  They are as rare as finding hens teeth.  No offense Cowboys, I am madly married to your type.  But you like your money where you can see it, hanging off your horse in the form of leather, rawhide, silver and horse hair.  Am I wrong?  Not that there is anything wrong with that, but investments are made more in the form of trading material for war bags.  A war bag is a fancy name for the huge duffel type bag that sits in the back seat of their pick-up that is full of trading good.  Trading material includes leather, rawhide, silver and horse hair investments.

Cowboys are tack rich and green backs poor.  Their hearts are rich with cowboy tall tales, while their trucks limp along on 3 spares and a recap. Their headstalls and silver shine like diamonds, while their ladies vacuum has more duct tape and bailing twine holding it together then the bed of their pick-up. And that is a lot of bailing twine.  Ever seen the bed of a cowboys pick-up………..

Now yes, these are generalizations, many which in time, you too will grow quite fond of.  In fact if you can’t beat them, might as well join them.  Now before I move on with a helpful list of antics, I need to remind you that “cowboys” are an elusive breed.  And within the breed there are many sub breeds of cowboys.  There are your “Puncher Cowboys”, “Rodeo Cowboys”, “Horse Trainer Cowboys”, “Drug Store Cowboys”, and my favorite which I am partial too and write only from experience, the “Californio/Nevada Buckaroo Cowboy”.  Each breed has its own list of accomplishments and ways.  But as for today I am writing to you about the fine specimen commonly referred to as the Buckaroo.  So any of you that have more experience with the other “breeds of cowboy” feel free to chime with your loving ways of handling.

So you want to marry a Nevada Buckaroo……..  Here are a list of “bewares, be careful’s, and beloveds”.  As I begin, ALL of this was learned the hard way, or should I say the humor building way.  Experienced first hand.  And as a girl friend then wife of one for almost 13 years, I feel it my ranch wife duty to offer you new comers to the sport some advice, helpful ways, and words of wisdom. But before I go on I must say, it has been the best 13 years of my life.  Never a dull moment, full of laughs, and even more love.  So here it goes.  Mire that hat down tight, get your spur lick in, and read on!

1. Time doesn’t exist…….  Why yes it does, oh no it doesn’t for your loving buckaroo man.  I should have learned this lesson early on.  The first date to be exact.  When he was almost an hour late.  Or our first Valentines, when dinner sat cold on the table for 3 hours as he was pig hunting with his bestie. Or every time we need to leave the house for an event and it takes an act of God to leave on time.  But that’s okay, he always reminds me to “don’t push the river” and “sit and wait for tomorrow”.  As frustrating as being late, to this type A wifey, can be, so much humility and grace has been learned by my Cow Boss man.  There is much to be appreciated about life from this lesson.  And for starters it is having grace and patience in all situations.  Time, well spent even if your late with your cowboy man.  So don’t sweat the “lateness” there is always tomorrow.  And remeber when your doctoring cattle, their is no clock your up against.
2. Second to None…..  Yup, I am sorry ladies, this has probably been the hardest one for me to accept.  But I hate to say it, the sooner you accept it,the easier life will be. And I don’t say this as a bad thing, honestly being second best to some of these items, may in fact be a blessing.  You are with a passionate being, and as much passion as he has for these things, he also has for you.  Let’s see, in no particular order, you will ALWAYS be a close second to: Branding Season!  Need I say more!  To ropings of any kind, to his best cow dog, his silver and rawhide, and yes probably to his buckaroo friends.  But you are HIS first place second.  He will love you just as much, just not as much as marking calves.  We laugh and joke about “love me as much as you love branding season” and though it may be a joke, it’s the truth.  But the passion he has for all his number one’s, he has for you his lady friend number one!
3. Everything is for trade…… UGH!  Yup, this is true.  Nothing is out of the woods.  Sometimes, I think, maybe I’m not even clear from present danger.  Just kidding, but really.  That bit he HAD TO HAVE, yup it gets traded.  Those rawhide reins that were a present, gone.  Or how about that spade bit he spent your entire honeymoon driving around looking for.  In the mail to it’s new owner.  I think the only thing that is safe, is his good dog and MAYBE his best bridle horse.  Past that, it is fair game.  Word to the wise, if YOU love it, trade him for it.  Then he can’t trade it off.  Your Welcome!
5. Dirt, Dog Hair, and Dust ….  Need I say more.  The illusions of white cushy furniture and anything nice, gone.  I mean you can have the white cushy cushions but they will be adorned with black and white border collie hair, muddy paw prints, and the back side imprint of your man’s jeans.  Not to mention afterbirth, shipping “mud”, and everything in between.  Replace white with “sand” or brown colored floors, furniture, fabrics.  That way it all blends in.  Embrace that the good dog will be treated like the favorite chosen child, dog hair will always be in your coffee cup, and “she” will ride in the middle seat of a standard cab pick-up on your first date.But you will fall in love with how much he love’s his first Mrs., being the canine friend, and she too will save your bacon when your learning to work cattle and the bulls start fighting in the middle of the creek.  She will “come by” from no where and get them boys moving again.  You too will learn to love the dirt, dog hair, dust, and cow aroma.  It’s a sign of a well lived and loved life.
6. Always on the phone… Seems strange for the cowboy creatures but yes, yes they are.  Just like war bag trading was the “Facebook Marketplace” of it’s time, cowboys have evolved to taking their trade bags to the world wide web.  So they are always trolling for the next best deal.  Or always on the phone to their “other Mr. wives”, or gossiping about who got bucked off of who, or who left where, or he did what, and the list goes on.  I’m pretty sure I have no less than 100 pictures of the Cow Boss on the phone.  On the phone shipping, loading trucks, waiting on trucks, doctoring cattle, driving, you name it.  But it could be worse.  At least he’s hustling, making deals, and getting things done.  But here is the secret ladies, many times the places you will go, service will not exist    , and that windshield time turns into the best story time.  He will serenade you, recite cowboy poetry, and solve the world’s problems right by your side.

So ladies……. you want to date and marry a cowboy?

I say why NOT.  They are rare and elusive.  But passionate and loving beyond belief.  As long as you go into it embracing who they are, it will be a wild ride.  Remember some colts can never be rode, and some cowboys can never be broke.  Don’t try and change who they are,  grow together.  It will take a lot of prayer, patience, and planning.  And that is why I always say, God has a special place in heaven for ranch wives.  We rope and ride, doctor the sick ones and calve the heavy ones.  We cook and clean and drive tractor.  Wind, rain, snow, or sun, a days work is never done.  But side by side with him, you can accomplish it all.  He will let you sleep while he changes water all night, and you will make sure the coffee is on before he leaves to ship cows.  It’s a team.  And that my friends is why it is all worth it.  So you want to marry a cowboy, I say go right on and do it.  Pull your boots up, stay in the middle, and always pray for rain!